I Once Had A Problem ... So

I Went To A Freak Show And They Let Me In For Nothing.

I Knew A Girl So Ugly That She Was Known As A Two-bagger. That's When You Put A Bag Over Your Head In Case The Bag Over Her Head Breaks.

Some Dog I Got Too. We Call Him Egypt. Because In Every Room He Leaves A Pyramid.

It's Tough To Stay Married. My Wife Kisses The Dog On The Lips, Yet She Won't Drink From My Glass.

I'm Tellin' Ya I Get No Respect. When I Was In Switzerland, I Got An Obscene Yodel.