I Don't Understand Why It Has To

The World Is Your Oyster When You Are Successful. That Was When I Was Getting Scripts. I Was Planning For This. I Like This Business. Parts Of It I Love, And I Didn't Want It To Just End. The Further You Get Away From Your Success, The Less Your Phone Rings. The Next Thing You Know, It's 20 Years Later And You're In A Mall Going, "remember When Al And I Used To Do Something Like This.

Speeding Is Like Drugs. It Makes Everything Come At You Fast, And When You Go Back To Normal Driving, Safe Driving, Prudent Driving, It Seems Boring. That's The Danger Of Drugs. At First It's Intoxicating, But Then The Rest Of Your Life You're Trying To Find That Very First Time. It Never Is The Same.

When You're 6 Or 7, Your Father Becomes This Wonderful Presence In Your Life. I Really Responded To My Father. And Then, The Very Moment I Realized That I Loved Him Unconditionally, That Life Was Going To Be Great Just Because He Was In It, He Was Gone.

Never Comment On A Woman's Rear End. Never Use The Words 'large' Or 'size' With 'rear End'. Never. Avoid The Area Altogether. Trust Me.

Electricity Can Be Dangerous. My Nephew Tried To Stick A Penny Into A Plug. Whoever Said A Penny Doesn't Go Far Didn't See Him Shoot Across That Floor. I Told Him He Was Grounded.