Housework Can't Kill You, But Why Take

Have You Ever Known Anyone Who Bought A Fruitcake For Himself? Of Course Not. They Are Purchased As Christmas Gifts, Mostly For People You Don't Particularly Like.

One [expert] Said, 'always Have A Baby Sitter Who Is Acquainted With Your Children.' If They Were Acquainted With My Children, They Wouldn't Sit!

Would You Believe That I Once Entered A Beauty Contest? I Must Have Been Out Of My Mind. I Not Only Came In Last, I Got 361 Get-well Cards.

I Realize It Is Normal To Argue. I Almost Missed World War Ii Watching My Parents Fight.

Best Way To Get Rid Of Kitchen Odors: Eat Out.