Christmas Seems To Start Earlier And Earlier

I Got A Letter From The Irs. Apparently I Owe Them $800. So I Sent Them A Letter Back. I Said, If You'll Remember, I Fastened My Return With A Paper Clip, Which According To Your Very Own Latest Government Pentagon Spending Figures Will More Than Make Up For The Difference.

I Once Had A Large Gay Following, But I Ducked Into An Alleyway And Lost Him.

I've Always Suffered From A Complete Inability To Sense Who's Important.

Christmas Seems To Start Earlier And Earlier Every Year. Like, This Time, It's On December 25th.

So I'm At The Wailing Wall, Standing There Like A Moron, With My Harpoon.