Before We Make Love, My Husband Takes

Your Proudest Moment Is To Watch Your Egg Not Just Function, But To Achieve On Her Own.

Learn What Not To Expect. Irish Catholic They Get Sh**** Little Rings. Irish Women Get Crappy Rings. Baptist Get The Worst Because They Get The Rings Under Water. When It Comes Up, It's Garbage. Jewish, Big Rings. Episcopalian Big Rings. Italians-the Best, Because They Get Them Off Of Dead People, And Second Wives Get The Biggest Rings Of All.

Women Should Look Good. Work On Yourselves. Education? I Spit On Education. No Man Is Ever Going To Put His Hand Up Your Dress Looking For A Library Card.

Keep Moving. It's Hard For Old Age To Hit A Moving Target.

Grandchildren Can Be Annoying - How Many Times Can You Go: "and The Cow Goes Moo And The Pig Goes Oink"? It's Like Talking To A Supermodel.