Anyone Who Hates Children And Animals Can't

When You Wake Up In The Morning, Smile - And Get It Over With.

I Note The Derogatory Rumors Concerning The Use Of Alcoholic Stimulants And Lavish Living. It Is The Penalty Of Greatness.

The Funniest Thing A Comedian Can Do Is Not Do It.

I Have A Poor Memory For Names; But I Seldom Remember A Face.

I Don't Drink Anymore, On The Other Hand I Don't Drink Any Less Either.