After Two Days In The Hospital, I

There Are Seven Natural Openings In The Head And Body. A Lawyer Is The Only Human Being With Eight. The Extra One Is A Slot To Store Money In, Should His Bank Be Unable To Hold All Of It.

I Only Drink To Steady My Nerves... Sometimes I'm So Steady I Don't Move For Months.

Don't Worry About Your Heart, It Will Last You As Long As You Live.

If I Ever Found A Church That Didn't Believe In Knocking All The Other Churches, I Might Consider Joining It.

I Have Been Advised By The Best Medical Authority, At My Age, Not To Attempt To Give Up Alcohol.