Anyone That Says Looks Don't Count Is

She's So Pure, Moses Couldn't Even Part Her Knees.

I Knew I Was An Unwanted Baby When I Saw That My Bath Toys Were A Toaster And A Radio.

Never Floss A Stranger.

I Caused My Husband's Heart Attack. In The Middle Of Lovemaking I Took The Paper Bag Off My Head. He Dropped The Polaroid And Keeled Over And So Did The Hooker. It Would Have Taken Me Half An Hour To Untie Myself And Call The Paramedics, But Fortunately The Great Dane Could Dial.

I Wish I Could Tell You It Gets Better. It Doesn't Get Better. You Get Better.