All Of Us Have Moments In Our

If Compliments Were Food, I'd Have Starved To Death 28 Years Ago.

I Was Too Old For A Paper Route, Too Young For Social Security And Too Tired For An Affair.

Authorities Say Brain Cells May Shrink, But They Don't Necessarily Die. Frankly, I Am Cheered By The Fact That Something Is Shrinking. I'd Be Even More Thrilled If What Was Shrinking Affected My Dress Size, But You Can't Have Everything.

The Ultimate In Longevity Is The Christmas Fruitcake. It Is A Cake Made During The Holidays With Fruits That Make It Heavier Than The Stove It Is Cooked In.

Marriage Has No Guarantees. If That's What You're Looking For, Go Live With A Car Battery.