Cleanliness Is Not Next To Godliness. It

There Is One Thing I Have Never Taught My Body How To Do And That Is To Figure Out At 6 A.m. What It Wants To Eat At 6 P.m.

Early In My Life I Had Made A Pact With Myself. I Would Never Eat Anything That Moved When I Cooked It, Excited The Dog, Or Inflated Upon Impact With My Teeth.

I've Exercised With Women So Thin That Buzzards Followed Them To Their Cars.

It's [motherhood] The Biggest On-the-job- Training Program In Existence Today.

I Became Hysterical And Frightened And Begged For Sedation. And That Was Just The First Prenatal Visit.