All Comics Want To Be Musicians. There's

I Still Have Highs And Lows, Maybe I Don't Cry Salty Tears As Much.

You Have To Be Able To Laugh At Yourself. That's What I Tell Asian People All The Time.

As Soon As A Woman Is Old Enough To Have An Opinion And Have A Voice And Be Unafraid, She's Very Much Encouraged By All Sorts Of People To Crawl Under A Rock And Die. And It's So Weird. My Crime Is Not Dying.

I Don't Like People Whose Job It Isn't To Be Funny, To Tell Me What Is And Isn't Funny.

If I Don't Do Stand-up For Two Weeks, I Get Freaked Out.