You Say You’re Sick, Huh? Well, It

Before I Proposed To My Now-wife, I Was Understandably Nervous. My Father Suggested That I Take Stock Of All Of My Experiences And Relationships With Women, From My Earliest Memories To Present Day, And See If I Had Learned Anything That Might Inform My Decision.

Eventually, Though, I Came To The Conclusion That I Was The Male Equivalent Of A Toyota Camry. You Know: No One Ever Says, "i Have To Have A Toyota Camry." But Most People Who Spend Some Time In A Camry Start To Like It. "it's Pretty Reliable," They Think. "it Doesn't Have A Lot Of Problems, And It's Not Bad To Look At. You Know What? I'd Probably Prefer A Nicer Car. But I Can Live With A Camry.

Why Would You Throw A Ball In Someone's Face?...huh. That's A Pretty Good Reason. Well, I Can't Do Much About Your Teacher Being Pissed, But Me And You Are Good.

I Was An Angst-y Journal Writing Kid.

I'm Not A Guy Who Curses Very Much In My Personal Life. When I Curse It Sounds Like A Kid Trying To Be Cool. But I Think There Are Quite A Few People, My Father Being One Of Them, Who Use Curse Words Rather Eloquently.