Think Of Me As A Sex Symbol

In Most States You Can Get A Driver's License When You're Sixteen Years Old, Which Made A Lot Of Sense To Me When I Was Sixteen Years Old But Now Seems Insane.

We Californians Are Constantly Accused Of Not Having Seasons, But We Do. We Have Fire, Flood, Mud, And Drought.

Your Husband Drinks Too Much If He Says He Never Drinks Alone, But Considers The Goldfish Somebody.

No Matter What Time Your Guests Arrive, Pretend They're Early, So Naturally You're Not Ready.

When He Proposed He Said, "we'll Make Such Beautiful Music Together," But In This Duet, His Part Seems To Be All Rests.