The Playboy Calendar This Year Has Some

Don't Smoke Too Much, Drink Too Much, Eat Too Much Or Work Too Much. We're All On The Road To The Grave - But There's No Need To Be In The Passing Lane.

The Next Time You Feel Like Complaining, Remember That Your Garbage Disposal Probably Eats Better Than 30 Percent Of The People In The World

To Err Is Human - And To Blame It On A Computer Is Even More So.

All That Means Is That Something Devastating Can Happen To You Today Or To Your Family & All You Can Do Is Cry About It Or Panic Or Just Be Grief-stricken About It; But A Year Or Two From Now Or Maybe Ten Years From Now, Or Maybe Two Months Or Two Days, You Might Be Able To See The Humor In That Problem.

I Should Warn You That Underneath These Clothes I'm Wearing Boxer Shorts And I Know How To Use Them.