The Only Reason I Can't Recommend Heroin

By The Time I Am Howard's Age I Hope To Be Long Retired. I Don't Plan On Working That Long.

I Once Dealt With A Prima Donna On A Movie Set. I Won't Say Who, But His First Name Is A Country. A Communist Country. Run By Fidel Castro.

A-rod Wants To Be Like Babe Ruth. And People Don't Realize This, He's A Lot Like Babe Ruth. Before The Playoffs A Couple Of Years Ago, A-rod Went To The Hospital And Promised A Dying Kid He'd Ground Out To Second For Him.

I'm Very Resilient. The Only Thing I'm Missing Right Now Are Abs.

I Used To Be A Longshoreman. I Didn't Go To College. I Have A Voice That When I Say Something, It Can Sound Way Meaner Than You Think It Is.