The Library Was Open For One Hour

Dear Anyone Who Finds This, Do Not Blame The Drugs.

I Need To Be Cheered Up A Lot. I Think Funny People Are People Who Need To Be Cheered Up.

He's Picked Clean! Eaten By Cats!

The Only Reason We Find Structure In Stories Is Because It's There Naturally In Human Interaction, And In The Way That People Tell Stories.

When An Attractive But Aloof ("cool") Man Comes Along, There Are Some Of Us Who Offer To Shine His Shoes With Our Underpants. There Are Thousands Of Scientific Concepts As To Why This Is So, And Yes, Yes, It's Very Sick But None Of This Helps.