The First Time I See A Jogger

I Think We All In Comedi Business, Especially When We Reach A Certain Age, Are Divas Up To A Point. I Love When A Limousine Comes For Me, I Can't Lie About That. I Love When You Go To A Restaurant And They Say, "come This Way, Miss Rivers," And You Get A Good Table. I Love All That, The Perks That Come With The Business.

I Have A Wonderful Psychiatrist That I See Maybe Once A Year, Because I Don't Need It. It All Comes Out Onstage.

A German Sense Of Humor Is An Oxymoron.

Never Buy A Fur From A Vegetarian.

The Nice Thing About Viagra Is That They Are Proving Men Can Go Blind On It, So You Can Gain Weight And Have A Great Sex Life.