The Battle Of The Sexes Will Never

When I Was Ten, My Family Moved To Downer's Grove, Illinois. When I Was Twelve, I Found Them.

I Told My Wife She Looks Sexy With Black Fingernails. Now She Thinks I Slammed The Car Door On Her Hand On Purpose.

I Caught My Wife In Bed With My Best Friend The Other Day. I Was Crushed. They Could Have Waited Till I'd Got Out.

Not Everybody Hates Me. Only The People Who've Met Me.

Now There's A Seven-day Waiting Period To Buy A Gun. Who Can Stay Mad That Long?