Sometimes, You Get Too Hopped Up, Too

Grownups Have To Say 'please,' Too.

No, We Don't Cheat. And Even If We Did, I'd Never Tell You.

If You'd See My Schedule, You'd Know I Have No Time To Slow Down.

One Time I Was Doing A Speech To A Group Of Kids, And Just Before I Get There, I See This Little Kid Crying. I Found Out They Just Lost A Game, And He Was The Losing Pitcher. I Went Over There, Put My Arm Around Him, And Said, 'what Are You Crying For? When Major League Players Lose, They Don't Cry.'

I've Never Used One Word Of Profanity In Front Of My Wife, Or My Daughter, Or My Granddaughter Or Anybody Else's Wife.