You Can Wake Up Every Day And

Say 'dodgers' And People Know You're Talking About Baseball. Say 'braves' And They Ask, 'what Reservation?' Say 'reds' And They Think Of Communism. Say 'padres' And They Look Around For A Priest.

Caltech Honored Me -- They Named An Asteroid After Me. There's Only Two Of Them Up There With Names. One Of Them Is Walter Cronkite. The Other Is Tommy Lasorda.

When You Say You're A Padre, People Ask When Did You Become A Parent. When You Say You're A Cardinal, They Tell You To Work Hard Because The Next Step Is Pope. But When You Say You're A Dodger, Everybody Knows You're In The Major Leagues.

I've Got A Portrait In The Smithsonian. Who Ever Thought That Would Happen?

Managing Is Like Holding A Dove In Your Hand. Squeeze Too Hard And You Kill It; Not Hard Enough And It Flies Away.