People - And I Include Myself -

It May Be A Cliché, But It's True - The Build-up To Christmas Is So Much More Pleasurable Than The Actual Day Itself.

Surely Being A Professional Beauty - Let Alone An Ageing One - Is One Of The Most Insecure And Doomed Careers Imaginable.

I Almost Choke On My Popcorn When I Hear Film Stars, Who Walk On Red Carpets As Much As The Rest Of Us Do On Zebra Crossings, Criticising Youngsters Who Crave Fame.

As A Precocious Teen I Dreamed Of Being Graham Greene. Well, As It Turned Out, I Never Wrote A Great Novel, Sadly, And I Never Converted To Catholicism, Happily, But I Did Do One Thing He Did. That Is, In Middle Age I Moved To A Seaside Town And Got Into A Right Barney With The Local Powers-that-be.

Only Those Who Haven't Got The Wit To Speak For Themselves Would Ever Want Their Clothes To Do It For Them.