Of Course Cocaine Is Not Adictive, Darling.

Going Down On A Woman Gives Me A Stiff Neck, Going Down On A Man Gives Me Lockjaw And Conventional Sex Gives Me Claustrophobia.

The Less I Behave Like Whistler's Mother The Night Before, The More I Look Like Her The Morning After.

I Did What I Could To Inflate The Rumor I Was On My Way To Stardom. What I Was On My Way To, By Any Mathematical Standards Known To Man, Was Oblivion, By Way Of Obscurity.

They Say It's The Good Girls Who Keep Diaries. The Bad Girls Never Have The Time. Me, I Just Wanna Live A Life I'm Gonna Remember Even If I Don't Write It Down.

[to The Critic Who Wrote A Negative Review:] I Am Sitting In The Smallest Room Of The House. Your Review Is Before Me. Soon It Will Be Behind Me.