My Sophomore Year I Spent Exactly One

I Have A Keurig Coffee Maker, Which Is Really Kind Of A Luxury. It Was Given To Me By An Ex. I Realized When I'm Feeling Sentimental, I'll Gently, Tenderly Press The Button. Then When I Remember He Dumped Me, I Punch It.

I Mean, You're Gonna Be Left Behind If You Don't Appreciate The Genius That Is Meredith Vieira.

One Christmas My Father Kept Our Tree Up Till March. He Hated To See It Go. I Loved That.

When It Comes To War, We Focus More On The Mainstream Coverage Of The Event, Rather Than The Event Itself. People Dying Is Never Funny. Protest Puppets Are Always Funny.

Generally I Get Up At Around 7. But Oftentimes, I'll Be Lolling In Bed A Little Bit Earlier - Sometimes As Early As 5:45 - Filing In My Mind All The Things I Have To Get Done. Which Is, Of Course, Totally Unproductive.