My Sister Gained 80 Pounds Expecting Her

I Like To Play Chess With Bald Men In The Park Although It's Hard To Find 32 Of Them.

My Girlfriend Said, Just Buy Me Something Crazy And Expensive, Something I Don't Even Need! So, I Signed Her Up For Radiation Treatment.

Santa Fe Is Fun To Visit, But Property There Will Cost You An Arm And A Dillo.

Now There's A Seven-day Waiting Period To Buy A Gun. Who Can Stay Mad That Long?

I Was Feeling A Bit Down, I Went To A Therapist A Few Times, At A Hundred Bucks A Pop. But Then I Realized That No Therapy Session Would Ever Cheer Me Up Half As Much As If I Was Just Strolling Along And Found A Hundred Dollar Bill.