My Character, Rick Spleen, Is A What-if

My Character, Rick Spleen, Is A What-if Version Of Me, Really, Where Nothing Did Quite Turn Out Right And Everything Else Is Still Around The Corner.

In My Local Newspaper, They Had This Advert: 'please Look After Your Neighbours In The Cold Weather'. I Live Next Door To This 84-year-old Woman, And Do You Know, Not Once Has She Come Round To See If I'm All Right. The Lazy Cow Hasn't Even Taken Her Milk In For A Fortnight.

I Hate People Who Think It's Clever To Take Drugs... Like Custom Officers.

I Really Like Rustic Mediterranean Cooking. And I Like Trying Out Curry Takeaways.

I Had A Longing For Ritual, Something I Could Cling To, A Routine To Make Me Feel Well And Contented. I Hoped That Reading Bible Commentaries And Theological Critiques Would Nudge Me Closer To Some Kind Of Absolute That I Could Hold Up As A Torch To Light My Way.