Liar, N. One Who Tells An Unpleasant

Monsieur Franqulin, Inventor Of Electricity. This Illustrious Savant, After Having Made Several Voyages Around The World, Died On The Sandwich Islands And Was Devoured By Savages, Of Whom Not A Single Fragment Was Ever Recovered.

Philanthropist, N.: A Rich (and Usually Bald) Old Gentleman Who Has Trained Himself To Grin While His Conscience Is Picking His Pocket.

Patience, N. A Minor Form Of Dispair, Disguised As A Virtue.

Immigrant: An Unenlightened Person Who Thinks One Country Better Than Another.

There Are Four Kinds Of Homicide: Felonious, Excusable, Justifiable, And Praiseworthy.