Laugh Now, Cry Later.

Marriage Has No Guarantees. If That's What You're Looking For, Go Live With A Car Battery.

No Self-respecting Mother Would Run Out Of Intimidations On The Eve Of A Major Holiday.

No One Diets On Thanksgiving.

No Baby Shall At Any Time Be Quartered In A House Where There Are No Soft Laps, No Laughter, Or No Love.

Humorists Can Never Start To Take Themselves Seriously. It's Literary Suicide.