Just Remember, Golf Is Flog Spelled Backwards.

Experience Is What You Have After You've Forgotten Her Name.

I Gave My Wife A Twenty-five-dollar Gift Certificate. She Used It As A Down Payment On A Mink Coat.

You Look Like A Normal Person, If You Can Find A Normal Person Who Wants To Look Like That.

When I Was In School, One Of My Teachers Was Crazy About Me. I Once Heard Her Tell Another Teacher, "i Wish He Was My Kid For One Day!"

Radio... That Wonderful Invention By Which I Can Reach Millions Of People... Who Fortunately Can't Reach Me.