Jim Gilmore Was The Only Gop Candidate

Nasa Is Developing Space Taxis To Shuttle Astronauts To The International Space Station. And Just Like New York Taxis, They're All Going To Be Driven By Aliens.

It Was A Great Olympics - Team Usa Finished The Games With 17 More Medals Than China. China Said It Was Tough To Swallow - Especially When They Had To Make All Of Our "we're #1" T-shirts.

John Mccain Addressed Critics Who Believe He Will Be Too Old To Run For A Sixth Term In The Senate, Saying That He's Still Healthy And Ready To Go. Then People Around Mccain Said, 'why Is He Talking To That Mannequin?'

According To A New Poll, 48 Percent Of Americans Believe That Hillary Clinton Is Honest And Trustworthy. Then Hillary Said, 'actually I Just Made That Poll Up.'

The Senate Came One Vote Short Of Granting Approval To Build The Keystone Pipeline. Democrats Say The Pipeline Could Accelerate Global Warming. Then People Who've Been Outside Today Said, 'sounds Good To Me. Let's Accelerate That Global Warming.'