J. Paul Getty, Who Still Hasn't Been

William Tell's Son, Telly, Who Said As His Father Was Pointing The Bow And Arrow At The Apple On His Head, There's Gotta Be An Easier Way To Kill Worms. Never Got A Dinner!

Joe Torre, Who Switched To First Base Because He Didn't Want To Go Through Life As Chicken Catcher Torre. Never Got A Dinner!

Pliny The Elder, Who When Rome Was Burning Requested Nero To Play You Picked A Fine Time To Leave Me, Lucille. Never Got A Dinner!

Amelia Earhart, Who Said, Stop Looking For Me; See If You Can Find My Luggage! Never Got A Dinner!

Goliath's Mother, Who Said To Goliath, Stop Running Around With David! You're Always Coming Home Stoned! Never Got A Dinner!