Ivory's The Kind Of Girl Who Gets

It's Hard To Tell These Days What Gender People Are. You Don't Know If They're Gay, If They're Straight, Or Bruce Jenner.

One Of My Girlfriends Was Getting Married. This Was Becoming An Annoying Pattern.

Maybe They Should Name More Drugs Cute Things. I Don't Do Meth, But Maybe If They Called Meth 'stefanie' I Would!

People Always Tell Me I Need To Have A Kid, And I Say, No, I Don't. Because I Wouldn't Have Just One Kid; I'd Have Six. I Need A Huge Family. So I Just Kind Of Fill My House With Tons Of Rejects And Misfits So It Feels Like I Have A Bunch Of Children.

It Became Clear When I Got In My Car That Persians Are Only Really Good For Two Things. Oil And Hummus.