It’s Being Reported That The Economy Lost

The French Announced Today That They Would Not Help Us Remove Saddam From Iraq. Well Duh! They Didn't Even Help Us Remove Hitler From France.

When They Said "make Love, Not War" At Woodstock, They Never Imagined That One Would Become As Dangerous As The Other.

You Know What's Sad About This? Not The Gambling, But The Best Way To Reach College Athletes Is The Cartoon Network.

Jesse Jackson's Wife Was Arrested In Puerto Rico While Protesting The Naval Bombings There. Jesse Said He Was Holding A Meeting With Four Of His Secretaries To Decide What To Do And That These Meetings Could Run Well Into The Night.

You Know, Something Like 90 People Who Have Now Filed To Run For Governor In This Recall Election. They Say There Could Be As Many As 200 People On The Ballot. You Know, It's Really Easy To Run Here In California. All You Need Is Like A Couple Of Signatures, Not Many, Thirty-five Hundred Bucks, You're On The Ballot, Like That. I Mean, What Does It Say About California? We Have Stricter Requirements To Get On 'american Idol' Than We Do To Run For Governor.