Ironically, The Possibility That The President Dodged

I Don't Want To Scare Anybody Here But We Just Received Word From Police That Howard Dean Is Loose And May Be Armed With A Microphone.

California's Economy Is Declining So Rapidly That Candidates Are Asking 'are You Better Off Now Then You Were Four Minutes Ago?'

As Fighting In Iraq Intensifies, President Bush Delivered His Supplemental War Budget To Congress. The Money Will Cover 30 Days Of Fighting, Then We'll Be Sent One War Every Other Month Until We Cancel Our Subscription.

Senator Hillary Clinton Is Attacking President Bush For Breaking His Campaign Promise To Cut Carbon Dioxide Emissions, Saying A Promise Made, A Promise Broken. And Then Out Of Habit, She Demanded That Bush Spend The Night On The Couch.

President Bush Has Delivered A New Resolution To The U.n. Saying That Saddam Has Failed To Cooperate With U.n. Resolutions, Freeing Us To Get Our War On. Don't Mess With Us France, Or We'll Send Jerry Lewis To Iraq As A Human Shield.