I'm Obviously Younger, Much Better Looking [then

If Obama Can Force You To Get Health Insurance Just By Calling It A Tax, Than There Is Nothing To Stop Him From Making You Gay Marry An Illegal Immigrant Wearing A Condom On A Hydroponic Pot Farm Powered By Solar Energy.

The Summer Movies Are Coming Out. My Advice: Just Stay Home And Burn A Good Book.

Asia: Four Little Letters, Three Billion Little People.

Last Night, We Did The Threatdown -- God, It's Hard To Even Talk About This -- And For The First Time, I Didn't Mention Bears. It's Winter, They're Asleep, I Didn't Think It Would Be A Problem. But Today I See This In The Toronto Globe And Mail -- Apparently A 700-pound Polar Bear Showed Up At A Children's Hockey Game. I've Said This Before, They're After Our Kids -- They're Tender, Juicy, You Don't Even Have To Throw Away The Bones.

I Hope You All Had A Wonderful Thanksgiving. Or, As It's Known To Native Americans - Sarcastic You're Welcomesgiving.