I'm Getting So Old, I Don't Even

Golf Is The Only Sport That A Professional Can Enjoy Playing With His Friends.

I Read The Greens In Spanish, But I Putt In English.

Putting Isn't Golf, Greens Should Be Treated Almost The Same As Water Hazards: You Land On Them, Then Add Two Strokes To Your Score.

I Never Pray To God To Make A Putt. I Pray To God To Help Me React Good If I Miss A Putt.

After All These Years, It's Still Embarrassing For Me To Play On The American Golf Tour. Like The Time I Asked My Caddie For A Sand Wedge And He Came Back Ten Minutes Later With A Ham On Rye.