I'm Eventually Gonna Take The Daryl Hannah

A Lot Of People Who Claim They're Political Comedians Are Just Comedians Who Have Opinions. But They Stop Being Funny The Minute They Give Their Opinions.

The 'phoenix Sun' Did A List Of The Unsexiest Men In The World, And I Made It To Number One. I Beat Out Bin Laden. He's A Terrorist, Hasn't Bathed In Months. I Beat Him Out. To Me It Was A Great Honor.

I Predict One Of These Two Teams Will Win The Super Bowl.

My Bubbie Lived To 104, Which Is Probably A Little Too Old To Consider A Ripe Old Age, Because She Had Already Started To Turn. I Still Say She Died Young.

I Always Try To Avoid Anything That Has To Do With My Life.