If You're Old Enough To Be Arrested,

I Read An Article That Said One In Five Americans Thinks Elvis Is Alive. I Want To Find Those Morons And Get Them Registered To Vote For Me.

I Came Down To Orange Because I Sold The Smothers Brothers A Song Called 'chocolate,' And That Gave Me Enough Money To Move Down Here. I Was Washing Windows Down In Orange County When They Called Me Up And Said They Wanted Me To Do Their Tv Show.

Why Should We Tell Kidnappers, Murderers, And Embezzlers Their Rights? If They Don't Know Their Rights, They Shouldn't Be In The Business.

I Don't Need Adult Supervision.

Now That My Wine Has Been Served In The White House, Why Not Me? Who Could Talk To Farmers Better Than I? Somebody Even Asked Me The Other Day If I Had Anything In My Platform About Taxes. 'hell Yes,' I Said. 'great State. But I Wouldn't Want To Live There.'