If I Had To Rank My Skills,

Conservative Humor Is Frankly Harder Than Liberal Humor. You Get Points For Just Being Liberal. You Can Get More Points If You Make Fun Of Your Own Side Sometimes.

I Don't Think Anyone Has Written A Great Graphic Novel.

I Think Jazz Is Good, But I Don't Enjoy It. It's Not For Me.

I Was Reading Through All These Nsa Programs That Snowden Has Revealed, And One Of The Ones That Fascinated Me Was That Smart Tvs Can Be Used To Look At You In Your Room. That Is Totally Like The Telescreen From 1984. It's Not Sort Of Like It, It's Not A Lot Like It, It Is It. And The Ability Of The Nsa To Turn On Your Cell Phone, Even If It's Powered Down, And Listen To You In Your Home - That's Insane To Me. People Had Been Warning That 1984 Was Just Around The Corner. Well, It Has Arrived, And Snowden Has Proven That.

When You Have Birds You Stare At Them A Lot And Their Eyes Are Recessed On Their Head. When They Look At Something They Tilt Their Head In A Quizzical Expression.