I Wish I Could Relate To The

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Wife Has A Beer Belly And You Find It Attractive.

Changing A Diaper Is A Lot Like Getting A Present From Your Grandmother - You're Not Sure What You've Got But You're Pretty Sure You're Not Going To Like It.

Because Criminals Know That When They See A House With 2 Foot Tall Grass, A Dog On A Chain, And An Engine Hanging From A Tree, A Gun Lives In That House. And If You Want To Know What Kind, Just Break In At 2 In The Morning.

You Might Be A Redneck If You Can Tell Your Age By The Number Of Rings In The Bathtub.

By The Time We Get To Church, I Need Church Cuz I've Been Yelled At By Everyone In The Family.