I Went Through Baseball As A Player

I Know A Baseball Star Who Wouldn't Report The Theft Of His Wife's Credit Cards Because The Thief Spends Less Than She Does.

It's Pitching, Hitting And Defense That Wins. Any Two Can Win. All Three Make You Unbeatable.

Never Trust A Baserunner With A Limp. Comes A Base Hit And You'll Think He Just Got Back From Lourdes.

Not Only Was I Not The Best Catcher In The Major Leagues, I Wasn't Even The Best Catcher On My Street!

My First Baseman Is George "catfish" Metkovich From Our 1952 Pittsburgh Pirates Team, Which Lost 112 Games. After A Terrible Series Against The New York Giants, In Which Our Center Fielder Made Three Throwing Errors And Let Two Balls Get Through His Legs, Manager Billy Meyer Pleaded, "can Somebody Think Of Something To Help Us Win A Game?" "i'd Like To Make A Suggestion," Metkovich Said. "on Any Ball Hit To Center Field, Let's Just Let It Roll To See If It Might Go Foul."