I Watched Ken Burns' Civil War Series

A Political Satirist's Job Is To Draw Blood. I'm Not So Much Interested In Politics As I Am In Overthrowing The Government.

Washington Couldn't Tell A Lie, Nixon Couldn't Tell The Truth, And Reagan Couldn't Tell The Difference.

Remember That No Matter How Selfish, How Cruel, How Unfeeling You Have Been Today, Every Time You Take A Breath, You Make A Flower Happy.

If You Can't Join Them, Beat Them.

People Tell Me There Are A Lot Of Guys Like Me, Which Doesn't Explain Why I'm Lonely.