I Was Lucky, You Know, I Always

Golf Is A Funny Game. It's Done Much For Health, And At The Same Time Has Ruined People By Robbing Them Of Their Peace Of Mind. Look At Me, I'm The Healthiest Idiot In The World.

On One Hole, I Hit An Alligator So Hard, He's Now My Golf Bag.

I Was Lucky, You Know, I Always Had A Beautiful Girl And The Money Was Good. Although I Would Have Done The Whole Thing Over For, Oh, Perhaps Half.

All British Castles And Old Country Homes Are Supposed To Be Haunted. It's In The Lease.

A Freudian Slip Is When You Say One Thing But Mean Your Mother.