I Was Getting Dressed And A Peeping

My Routines Come Out Of Total Unhappiness. My Audiences Are My Group Therapy.

I Think Anyone Who's Perfectly Happy Isn't Particularly Funny. And When You're Very, Very Happy, You're Not Very Funny. You're Just Happy. I'd Rather Be Damaged And Funny.

I Have No Sex Appeal, Which Kills Me. The Only Way I Can Ever Hear Heavy Breathing From My Husband's Side Of The Bed Is When He's Having An Asthma Attack.

I'm So Fat And I'm So Depressed; Last Night I Tried To Hang Myself - But The Rope Broke.

Whatever You Do To Recover From A Loss, People Will Be Critical Because They Believe That The Only Way To Recover Is Their Way. And You Will Even Run Into Some People Who Should Be Run Into By Rhinos Because They Actually Don't Want To See You Get Over Your Tragedy At All; Grief Is A Spectator Sport For Them.