I Wanna Get A Little Drunk, But

Once You Get Offstage You're Just Like Everyone Else, And Everyone Else Can Get Into A Fight.

If I Had A Kid, I'd Give Him A Name That Would Make Everyone Would Want To Say His Name. I'd Call Him, Pizza-pussy-santa. I Would! Cause Everybody Likes One Of Those Things.

I Don't Think I'm A Star Or A Celebrity Or Any Thing Like That.

Yeah, I Know, Some People Are Against Drunk Driving, And I Call Those People 'the Cops.' But You Know, Sometimes, You've Just Got No Choice; Those Kids Gotta Get To School!

Every Dude In Here Has Had A Fantasy About Jessica Simpson. Here's Mine: Jessica, Hold Your Sister Ashlee So I Can Kick Her In The Throat.