I Played An Unsympathetic Part -- Myself.

A Politician Is A Man Who Will Double Cross That Bridge When He Comes To It.

I'm A Concert Pianist, That's A Pretentious Way Of Saying I'm Unemployed At The Moment.

So Little Time And So Little To Do.

I Don't Drink. I Don't Like It. It Makes Me Feel Good.

An Epigram Is Only A Wisecrack That's Played At Carnegie Hall.