I Made A Terrible Mistake Last Christmas.

The Only Thing That Can Break A Piece Of Valentine Candy Is Another Piece Of Valentine Candy.

This Is How It Is Today: The Teachers Are Afraid Of The Principals. The Principals Are Afraid Of The Superintendents. The Superintendents Are Afraid Of The Board Of Education. The Board Is Afraid Of The Parents. The Parents Are Afraid Of The Children. The Children Are Afraid Of Nothing!

She Wanted An Italian Sports Car - With The Sport Still In It.

I Know Why Superman Left Krypton. Earth Was The Only Place Where He Could Get Steriods!

This Man's Wife Told Him, "for Christmas, Surprise Me." On Christmas Eve He Leaned Over Where She Was Sleeping And Said, "boo!"