I Don't Shoot Guns. I Don't Know

We Have A Really, Really Great Dog. It Doesn't Bark. My Dog Almost Smiles, Which Is Weird. He's Just A Very Happy Dog.

According To A New Poll, Republicans Are More Likely To Have A Doughnut For Breakfast, While Democrats Prefer To Eat Bagels And Croissants. While Independents Are That Annoying Friend Who's Still Looking At The Menu After 15 Minutes.

They're Making A Movie About Barack And Michelle Obama's First Date, Called 'southside With You,' And The Producers Say They've Already Cast Someone To Play Young Barack Obama. Now, I'm Not Saying The President Has Aged A Lot But That Young Actor Is Morgan Freeman.

Nasa Is Developing Space Taxis To Shuttle Astronauts To The International Space Station. And Just Like New York Taxis, They're All Going To Be Driven By Aliens.

Apparently, The Obamas Chose New York City Because They've Gotten So Used To People Trying To Break Into Their House.