I Am Accusing Him Of Stealing My

What's The Difference Between My Wife And A Terrorist? You Can Negotiate With A Terrorist.

My Wife Went Into The Butchers And Said: "you've A Sheep's Head In Your Window." The Butcher Said: "that's A Mirror."

I've Been Married To My Wife For 60 Years But It Feels Just Like Yesterday, And You Know What A Bloody Awful Day Yesterday Was.

I Said To The Waitress, "there's A Fly Swimming In My Soup." She Said: "you've Got Too Much Soup - He Should Only Be Able To Paddle."

This Is Frank Carson, News At Ten, Sober.