I Always Wanted A Beautiful Loving Wife

I Was In A Bar The Other Night, Hopping From Barstool To Barstool, Trying To Get Lucky, But There Wasn't Any Gum Under Any Of Them.

I Used To Get Drunk Every Night Until I Puked. Finally I Admitted, "i Am A Bulemic".

I Think Fur Looks Better On An Animal Than On A Human Being. So I Dress My Dog In A Mink Teddy.

Actually, My Cd Was Released In 1985, In Return For Two German Missionaries And A Dutch Urologist.

People Come Up To Me... Concerned... That I'll Reproduce.