Hitler Really Wasn't So Bad. In The

My Girlfriend Was Just Killed In A Car Accident. Devastating. I Can't Believe I'm Only Going To Have Sex With Her One More Time.

This Past Christmas, I Told My Girlfriend For Months In Advance That All I Wanted Was An Xbox. That's It. Beginning And End Of List, Xbox. You Know What She Got Me? A Homemade Frame With A Picture Of Us From Our First Date Together. Which Was Fine. Because I Got Her An Xbox.

I Can't Talk Politics With My Cousin Because He's Such A Hypocrite. He's Against The Death Penalty And He Hanged Himself.

On Twitter, When Someone Would Die, I Would Write A Joke. Or If There's A Tragedy, I Would Write A Joke And Tweet It. That Was My Thing, And Then At A Certain Point, People Started Demanding It.

Do Whatever You Want To Do, Whenever You Want To Do It